I’m Not Ready to Bury My Husband

by Frank

At A Spark Starts our goal is to provide stories that will motivate, change and inspire you. Well today for the first time we will let you hear from a voice other than Jermaine and I. Today we share a story that was so moving and humbling that I am thankful that it was brought to my attention.

This post is a personal testimony written by Charity Wheeler. Thank you so much for sharing. We are honored to post it.

First Aid Box

Photo by Renjith Krishnan

Imagine with me on a normal chilly February day taking your spouse in for a routine outpatient knee procedure that is suppose to last for 30 minutes. The waiting room is full and surgery has been pushed back, because of the overloaded schedule of patients going in to get their ailing body parts mended. Finally, the time has arrived and the techs wheel him back into surgery. Thirty minutes later I was told that surgery went fine, the only reason they would keep him is if his pain is too bad to send him home. I reviewed the pictures of the surgery and then returned to the waiting room to wait anxiously for his release.

Twenty minutes goes by and the nurse liaison comes to tell me that the doctor needs to speak with me again. My father asked me if I want him to go back there with me and I replied, “No because they probably just need to keep him because of his pain.” I go into the small consultation room and moments later a doctor (that I never saw before) and the anesthesiologist come in to advise that they had to put my husband on a ventilator. The next 24 hours are very critical. My jaw drops and panic sets in. The Chaplin comes in to pray and the tears began to fall like torrential rain. All I could think and say was…


The next few weeks were spent on a roller coaster ride in ICU. My daughter, 3 year old at the time, and I slept in the waiting room for 34 days. The only time I left the hospital was to go home to shower and to take her to the daycare, in-order to keep some type of normalcy in her life. On one particular day early in our storm, I remember leaving the hospital and I began chanting non-stop, “God please give me a sign today that everything is going to be ok.” I repeated this chant all day long. It was about 9:00 PM when I realized that nothing had changed.

I said, “God, today is not over, there is still time.”

One of my aunts who was sick with a cold sent word to me through her daughter that she wanted to come to the hospital, however she did not want to make anyone else sick. Around 9:30 PM she walked through the doors of the waiting room and said, “God told me to come.” She continued by stating “All I want to do is pray.” My aunt, cousin, and I proceeded to my husband’s room and we made a circle around his bed. We held hands and she began to pray, “Lord, in the name of Jesus.” All of a sudden his machine started going crazy and I ran out of the room, crying, I thought my husband was dying.

The nurses came into the room and my cousin came to get me from the hall. She said “Charity he is fine! The nurse said I do not know what you all were saying, but he started biting down on his tube to let you know that he is alright.” They sedated him more so that he could relax and calm down.

34 Days

Though he did not get out of the bed the next day to come home, that was the sign from God that I prayed for. He was in ICU for 34 days total. He had to learn how to walk, talk, basically how to do everything all over again. He went into the hospital on 02/22/2001 and finally after three different hospitals was able to come home on 04/28/2001.


My husband persevered…
My daughter persevered…
Our family and friends persevered…
The medical staff persevered and…
I persevered…

Eccl 9:11 I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all.

Whatever you are going through right now know that it’s not over. Continue to move forward in faith and prayer.

Want to know more about Charity Wheeler? Here is her personal bio:

A CHILD OF THE KING, Funny, Outgoing, Sincere, Dedicated, Yearning for success, Goal Setter, Dreams that only God can make come true, A writer, Inspirational, Creative, Small Business Owner, Loving, Kind. I am a Wife, Mother, Student, Daughter, Sister, and Friend. I love bringing JOY to others. I am Charity Wheeler and I look forward to encouraging and enlightening you.